Erik Erikson's Stage of Psychological Development tells us that
adolescents are in the stage of searching for self-identity. For those who are fixated
at this stage, they will find role confused which affects their development in
the following stages. In my observation, this identity issue has obviously
extended.
Identity crisis is the situation that a person does not know what to
do with his life. One of my friends told me he could not feel any true
happiness after coming back from working holiday in Australia. He could not
focus on a book, movie or anything he used to enjoy in. He fancied something
unknown. He felt he himself did not belong to here, but he did not know what
and where he belonged to. He sought jobs according to his parent's wishes, and
also because of his girlfriend. He worked like a gearwheel of a machine, playing
his role without feeling. He lived like a robot. He revealed that he was not
the only one who had this kind of feeling after working holiday.
I am not sure about the causes of this situation. However, there is
an observable fact. In Australia, "I do what I really want", while in
Hong Kong, "I do what the others want me to do". My friend had a dream,
be an outward bound trainer. However, the salary of a trainer is $11000 per
month only. He believed his parents would object to this decision. Moreover, he
would like to provide her girlfriend a stable living which cannot be secured by
working as a trainer.
Karl Marx described human as "a conscious being, (who) makes
his life activity, his essential being, a mere means for his existence".
However, it is difficult for a person to be himself, to work directly for his
needs and to follow his wills and choices. The process has been intervened by
money, materials and the belief of "Good Life".
In Australia, my friend worked in a farm. His income depended on how
many fruits he picked. He could enjoy the fruit while picking. The relationship
between his efforts and rewards was in proportion. The relationship between
him, as a person, and the land was close. What he needed to do was planning how
to earn more by traveling to different farms every day. There was meaning for
each of his actions.
However, it was totally different when he came back. Working in a
city, the relationship between efforts and return is indirect. People work
because of the salary. Salary can be
used for food and bills. Spared salary becomes savings which may be used for
buying a flat. A flat provides a chance to build up a family, and then, it is possible
to have a child and so on. These are some of the imaginations of a faraway
future. Actually, some people may not imagine their future because having a
child is another cycle to earn more money, which goes back to the first step.
In addition, the most terrible thing is what your family members and
peers may tell you that it is the right track towards "Good Life".
When you were young, they started suggesting, helping, and motivating you to
enter the university, which they believe is the right way. After your graduation
from university, they stop the intensive intervening and tell you "I have
done what I had to and here comes your turn. Go to find a good job (according
to salary and welfare) and form a family. I am waiting for my grandchild." Some people just follow the others’
suggestion and their counterparts start asking themselves a question,
"What do I really want?"
It is never too late asking this question. People may feel lost and
uncomfortable in asking this question but it is an important question. It is a
chance to search for the inner wants and needs, to have better
self-understanding and to live a new life for a person to be a person.
The word “crisis” consists of two words in Chinese, risk and
opportunity. The rising trend of the identity crisis in teenagers and young
adults is representing some structural problems in the society. The government
should face the problems. Otherwise, it will start as individuals' issues and
end up as social crisis.